Above all, constantly echo God’s intense love for one another, for love will be a canopy over a multitude of sins- 1 Peter 4:8 (TPT)
Offence is one of the biggest factors that can hinder us from living the full life of love that God wants for us. Over time it can cause us to accumulate unforgiveness in our hearts and as a result opens the door for the devil to express himself in our lives in different forms- bitterness, rage, anger, sickness and much more.
In life, people will hurt us (this is a that’s guarantee), either people who are close to us (friends or family) or even a stranger can hurt us. But regardless of how much we are hurt or how much pain we may experience from people, it is still our responsibility to make sure we don’t let the hurt sit and live in our hearts. We are responsible for our own spiritual growth and whatever is not of God should not remain.
How we are to deal with offence and hurt from people and even from ourselves is to learn how to respond with love. But let me tell you that this is not always easy. In fact, it becomes ten times harder when the hurt is coming from someone we trust and from our very close circle. However, we are commanded to echo God’s love to other people, because when we respond in love, we automatically set ourselves free from any bitterness and unforgiveness and we also close all doors that the enemy may gain entry into our lives.
Before it hits your heart, respond quickly with love. This doesn’t mean that you should allow someone to make you feel invaluable, worthless or belittle you. But in whatever way someone may hurt you, find a way to address the matter in love– approach them in love and express your feelings in love. Your response (no matter how right you are) must be in love. Don’t respond if you know that what you will say is directly aimed at hurting the person who hurt you just so they know you were hurt.
If you know what you will say will not either get your point across from a place of love then don’t say anything until you are ready to respond in love. As hard as it may be, try and see the situation from a place of compassion (Ephesians 4:32).
It is when we forgive other people their sins when they offend us can our heavenly Father now forgive us our sins. Our sins will NOT be forgiven by God until we have forgiven those who have sinned against us (Matthew 6:14).
Remember, some people don’t know Christ and our responses to the way they treat us could be the way we show them who Christ is. We are commanded by God to forgive as Christ also forgave us (Colossians 3:13).
Let love settle all offences in your heart. It is not worth it to carry grudges or bitterness towards anyone, let it go. Talk to Jesus about it. Sometimes it will have to be a consistent conversation with him to help you let go and love instead of hate.
Some key ways that can help to “let love settle the matter“:
- Don’t respond when you are angry
- ONLY respond from a place of love (ask yourself before you send the message/call etc “will what I am going to say hurt this person?. Is my motive for sending this message aimed at taking revenge or hurting them”. If your motive is love then it’s okay. Even what you say to someone from a place of true love can still hurt them. But the main thing is that YOU are responding from a place of love. Take care of your heart, God will do the rest.
- Meditate on what God says about love (even if you have to read it seventy-seven times).
- Pray for them- This is hard to do, but you can start during your quiet time with God- bringing the matter to him.
- Pray for your heart. Ask God to give you the heart to love and a forgiving heart.
- Pray the scripture of love over you and over the person.
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